Monday, 25 September 2017

The Travel Bug


Hello Everyone! 

I won't beat around the bush, this post quite simply is about hopping on a plane and letting it take me to some of the most exotic places. 

Since January I had this sudden urge to go travelling. One of my friends left to go to Australia without a return ticket and I had this desirable surge of energy to get up and follow her. Travelling had always been a small part of my future. I had never managed to plan where it would fit into my life and when exactly I would do it. I put that mainly to the fact that I kept changing my mind about my career and in doing so studied three different courses in the desired career choice (I change my mind like a pair of socks some would say) This left me working part time for the past 6 years and I was never able to afford a holiday to Spain let alone a trip that lasted more than a month.

It wasn't until I finally got my first job in the city that I was saving money and I realised that if I saved enough, these travelling plans may actually come true.



So 8 months ago I had a chat with myself and decided that yes, I was in fact going to go travelling and nothing could stop me now, not that I had made this decision. 

Why travelling some of you may ask? Why not just do loads of holidays to different places? Well that was once my plan, but then I saw my sister jet off to Thailand a few years back and she had the time of her life. I hear so many amazing stories about what you see when you go to these beautiful countries. I want to be able to see what they've seen. Don't get me wrong, I love England/Essex, it will always be my home. But there is so much more to life on this big planet and I am really in need of a change of scenery.

I have only been working in the city for over a year and already I can't stand London. I hate the trains, the way people forget manners, and I hate that I have forgotten how much fun it was to travel into London to see the sights. I have forgotten the beauty of our iconic buildings and streets. I feel as though i need to leave for a while in order to come back and really appreciate it. I've also discovered - and this may shock you - that even after studying all of those college courses, I STILL DON'T KNOW WHAT I WANT TO DO!! How can this be?! Well I think this society has driven into me that I don't ever want to work in the city. I want to see the world and not have to worry. Of course that isn't realistic and I know that, but if I could keep blogging for the rest of my life then I SO would. So for now, I am hoping that having a break from these responsibilities may help me decide what the future holds for me.



I am also hoping that I may fall in love with one of these amazing countries and maybe move there for a bit (why not?!) I need to gain my independence. I need to understand more about who I am and what I want in life. Travelling is the way forward. Appreciating the little things in life that we really take for granted. Of course I am terrified. I'm going to miss my family and friends, not forgetting
my bed (lol priorities) and not having an income will be hard to handle for a while but so worth it.

The Itinerary  is as follows - Straight to Thailand, from there Cambodia, Laos and Vietnam, Maybe head to Malaysia and The Philippines (depending on my budget) then to New Zealand, Fiji and then finally Australia. I plan on working in Aus just so I can save more money and travel around 'cause lets face it, it's blimming huge!!

I've been saving my arse for this ever since and I honestly cannot wait to board that plane to Bangkok. My first ever solo travel will be a story I can tell, something I can remember for the rest of my life. And let's be honest, this life we have is short (excuse the cliche) and we may as well make the most of it!

I plan on writing many a blog post when I am back, all about my adventures, so stay tuned.

I hope this inspires many of you to do the same. 
If it's something you have thought about, I say DO IT! 


xx




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Friday, 8 September 2017

Living With Tinnitus

Inspired by Baby Driver 


When this film came out recently I was instantly inspired to write something. Something that is quite personal, not in an uncomfortable sort of way, but definitely something that I've been wanting to write about for ages. So when Ansel himself stepped onto our screens with  a much beloved pair of earphones, my heart was racing. I knew the exact feeling.


Tinnitus isn't a word we hear very often. Well I certainly hadn't. I even pronounced it wrong when I first read it. This was 2 years ago now but I'll remember that day for a very long time. For those of you who don't know what Tinnitus is it is a condition whereby the person experiences a constant sound in their ears, one or both of them. This can be a ringing sound, a whooshing, a lot of people can experience different sounds which is why there is no current cure. To measure every different sound would take time and there probably isn't a lot of funding for this particular area. Which of course I do understand, although I would love to know the reason why I have it, it mostly occurs in older people and ironically my Nan has it!

I don't know the exact reason I developed this condition and nor could the Doctor tell me its exact longing to become somewhat of an annoyance. 

But I remember having been out for my friends birthday on the Saturday 22nd August, at the club Kanaloa to be precise - which BTW I would definitely recommend going it's so much fun!! I was very aware of the music being very loud even for a nightclub. Anyway, on  the Tuesday from then I could not sleep to save my life. There was this constant beating in my ear, my heart beat to be exact. I have had this before I know probably everyone has had this because of the way we lay on our sides. But mine literally wouldn't stop. And it hasn't stopped since. I did that really stupid thing and Googled my diagnosis (we are all victims of this!) and Tinnitus was the first explanation. Every night I would dread going to bed of fear of this annoying sound because of course there isn't much noise at night every sound is distinctive. I eventually made an appointment at the doctors who suggested I get my ears syringed. This didn't work. I was then referred to an ENT specialist and after many hearing tests it was clear I had Pulsatile Tinnitus.


I had the most AMAZING Doctor who helped to explain how to deal with this. What she told me was this - although this is an actual condition and there is a sound that each person hears, it is also a psychological thing. The more we think about the sounds the louder they will appear and therefore harder to block out. She told me the best way to forget about the sound is to think of it as something you don't like to hear or cringe at hearing. For example when we hear noises like nails on a chalkboard or cutlery scraping on the plate, those noises our brains have automatically been triggered to forget. This is what we have to do. This has helped me so much and maybe it's because I have gotten used to it I just don't think about it.


One thing I had to do for myself was find a way to sleep. No matter how much you can try and forget about a noise at night the world is silent. I found the most life-changing app. Someone suggested listening to White noise at night out loud, but I found through earphones was much more useful. However White noise didn't block out the beating I was hearing, so instead every night I listen to light Rain sounds. It has a timer so you can decide when you want the sounds to stop or if you just need them to help you fall asleep and then stop. I have it on all night, it just soothes me and a lot of the times I'll wake up and the earphones have fallen out anyway. My love for good earphones has also changed drastically as you can imagine! (btw this app I have on my iPhone, I'm not sure if it Is available on other smart phones FYI)

I still get really wary about not sleeping at home. If I'm ever staying round a friends or when I'm on holiday my priority is making sure there is a plug socket near my bed. I've never been so grateful for electricity in my life! And there was me thinking do we really need it when the earth has been here surviving for millions of years without it? BUT nope! Christina now needs to plug her phone in at night in case her battery dies and she can't listen to her rain sounds anymore!  



|Picture from Pexels|


Basically I wanted this to be about two things that I have learnt through this.

1. Just because you can't see a condition doesn't mean it doesn't exist. And with this one I know a lot of people will think it's easy to deal with. Trust me, unless YOU have it, you can't understand the frustration. Also I do realise that there are worse things in the world, I just wanted to share this.

2.  I learnt how to find peace and happiness in spite of it. This goes for anything to be honest, but I found how to wind down after a long day and how to not let this affect anything I do in my life with work or socialising. You can still enjoy everything!!





For anyone who has just discovered that they have Tinnitus or are struggling to deal with it, I hope this post reaches you and inspires you <3<3<3

xx

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